So Today, (10/10/17) is Mental Health Awareness Day, (yes I am completely aware of the date shown on the post). Although the focus & awareness for Mental Health should not be limited to one day today is the day where around the world we take a minute to stop, acknowledge and support the fight against Mental Health.
This year the World Health Organisation (WHO) are spotlighting Mental Health within the Workplace, a topic not discussed enough.
When you feel swamped with emotions & weighed down by your anxiety, work is the last thing you want to concentrate on, socialising with colleagues just seems intolerable but yet you feel obligated to participate & continuously attempt to work efficiently. Credits due if your able to hold your poise within your work place & bury your feelings but I believe (& this is just my personal opinion) that doing this will later cause one of two things;- 1. An outburst within your workplace resulting in a weird/uncomfortable work setting for yourself & colleagues or 2. You begin to view work as a negative space, the thought of waking up to go to work everyday puts you in a foul mood resulting in a negative attitude towards work. Both result in an unproductive work setting.
The aim for this years Mental Health Awareness is to encourage Employers & Managers to implement methods to support Mental Health within the workplace by promoting the health, safety & wellbeing of all employees. I read a couple methods that would be great if implemented within the workplace correctly;
– Addressing negative workplace dynamics
– Job redesign
– Flexible hours
– Supportive & Confidential communication with management
It’s time to talk guys, if you feel like your workplace needs a bit of encouragement in supporting mental health don’t be afraid to bring it to your manager. Help spread the message guys.
Peace + Love
Side note: I am aware of the date I posted, I actually fell asleep before getting the chance to post on the 10th. My apologies.x
Okay so I’m very late to the party, I think I am anyway but it doesn’t matter because I’ve finally joined the party The Insecure party and when I say this is a show that must be watched. It Must Be Watched.
After Game of Thrones and Power decided to you know give us their final episodes, I just weren’t sure what I was going to fill my TV time slot with. Then I saw a friend from America had posted on Facebook about her night of TV catch-up . Insecure was one of them, I weren’t sure if she had misspelt something. So I went to check it out online, found it & thought ‘hey lets give this a try’. I ended up watching Season 2 Episode 7 first and seriously I think I got about 10 minutes into it & can you believe within a day I had gone back & finished Season 1 and was well into Season 2…WOW what an awesome show. It discusses every subject you could possibly think of. As a Black woman with insecurities, this show gives perspective on what it’s like to live within today’s society. The struggles of finding your feet in relationships, friendships & work while dealing with insecurities and anxiety. Insecure really opens up your eyes to the various natures of people’s ways. I would recommend this show, I think a majority of the topics discussed within the episodes are valid, Issa Rae makes you feel like she’s in your mind. As if your going through the same experiences and to be honest in today’s day and age I think that’s what we need on TV for 2017. Programs that not only Black women can relate too but every woman of any race. So yeah check it out, if you’re like me, you might just get really addicted and watch the whole season within a day. I recommend it for everyone because not only does she embrace the issues that young women face today but she does it in a manner that allows you to face your own insecurities and kind of make a joke out of it. I love that & oh my days the soundtrack for the series is absolutely amazing, I am most definitely recommending watching this series. For all females out there with Insecurities add this to your favourites list!
P.S If you ever watched Girlfriends back in the day, you’ll like this show I feel like its a 2017 adaptation of Girlfriends.
I recently committed myself to reading a scripture out of the bible daily as well as a chapter a day out of a book titled ‘The Purpose Driven Life’
Isn’t it annoying when you unexpectedly wake up to a sucky day. I mean everything sucks, one thing seems to go wrong causing a domino effect throughout your day. I recently had one of those days, it caused me to stop & assess my purpose in life.
To be honest I think it started from the night before. I stayed up through the night reading up on a young American girl who was recently murdered & left in a freezer, just reading & researching the story clouded my mood & my heart resulting in me having an irritable sleep. So the minute I woke up it was inevitable i’d be in a bad mood. I felt like there was nothing I could do that would pull me out of this mood but I gave it a try anyway. Pulled myself out of bed & attempted to make a hearty ‘get your day started’ breakfast. Well lets just say that didn’t go to plan, I ended up staring at my open cupboards for about 20 minutes hoping a creative idea would jump out at me, that didn’t happen either. I started to stress, a task so small but yet I just couldn’t follow through with it. I tried to take a breath to calm my anxiety. Why was such a simple task causing such an issue? Why couldn’t I just make a decision? This had me thinking about my entire life, I can never make decisions & stick to them. My indecisiveness is my biggest weakness, a simple decision that can be answered quite easily for others requires time & a whole lot of overthinking for me. On a bad day my overthinking can lead me to start feeling sorry for myself, I develop this woe is me attitude, ashamed of myself & my failures. Once I’m in this state it’s quite hard to get out of. I begin scrutinising every failure i’ve occurred, picking my life apart bit by bit, punishing myself with the memories. Literally verbally & mentally abusing myself.
For other individuals a sucky day can be overcome quite easily. I find that people who deal with depression find it’s far from easy. A rubbish day turns into a rubbish week where I question my reason & purpose for being on this planet, for receiving certain blessings that others would appreciate much more.
I dwell on these factors believing this is me, this is the failure I was created to be, this is my purpose but and that is a BIG BUT that is not the case. I can not stress enough how important your purpose is, whether it’s to make an impact out there in the world or positively influence yours or your families life there is a reason for your life & despite the trials & tribulations of it, it is always possible to overcome it.
I’m going to end this post with a scripture I read out of the book The Purpose Driven Life, that I personally felt touched my heart & allowed me to get up and start over.
‘I know what I’m planning for you…I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope & a good future.’ Jeremiah 29:11
Peace + Love
Today something came over me, something powerful & endearing. I experienced an Awakening. I don’t know where it came from but it took over.
I stopped everything I was doing & bent my knees to pray (now this is something I don’t really do, if I pray it’s usually in whatever spot I’m already in). Today I got on my knees & prayed. I prayed for guidance & support. I thanked God for all that he has done, all this time I thought I wasn’t being listened too & that I was just here with no purpose.
Oh how I was wrong, all this time I’ve known what I wanted or needed to do in life, I’ve always wanted to help those similar to myself but a lack of faith within myself kept me holstered. I’ve let opportunities & blessings fly by, becoming complacent with my life not believing I had what it took to accomplish these opportunities but not today. Today I had my awakening, I manifested the signs God has been sending me & I prayed on them. I decided no more holding myself back I will fulfill what God has proclaimed for me.
It’s going to be a hard journey, I know but it’s one I’m willing to commit too, if helping myself means I can help someone else experience their awakening & encourage the positivity within that individual, why shouldn’t I push myself to do so?. I’ve got so much goals to complete when it comes to Cocktail Minds & I’m ever so excited.
My next step will be too overcome the barriers I hold in front of myself by becoming more organised, using my excitement as a stepping stone rather than a way to escape reality & networking more with similar individuals.
My depression will not rule me forever, it’s ruled my life for far too long, holding me back & beating me down. Today i’m rising off the ground head & fist held high ready to conquer!.
My Top 5 Anxiety Hangups
1. Failing as a mother
Everyday without fail, I wonder if i’m doing everything I can for AJ, he has a set routine which I love but it’s the in between that worries me. I’m always worrying about whether i’m doing enough for him socially & educationally. Is he learning enough? Am I giving him enough attention for his development. Do I need to do more activities with him?. Then the hyperventilating kicks in, the tears follow & all of a sudden i’m a bad mother. This happens quite regularly because of my lack of self-confidence when infact my son is the happiest & most entertaining/entertained child i’ve had the pleasure of being around. At 14months he says “thank you” & has the capability to understand the counting process when his misbehaving, among other things. My anxiety doesn’t allow me to enjoy these facts though,instead i’m constantly anxious & berating myself to do more.
These days I would like to blame social media (but I won’t) for making people feel like they are failing in life. Seeing the luxury lives being lived on Instagram, the beautiful women, clothes, cars etc. It produces a sense of envy & disdain, for myself it does anyway. It makes me feel as if i’m not doing or accomplishing enough to gain the luxury material things that I see & want . Keywords: Material & Want (not need). I have to remind myself that everyone has the same 24hrs & it’s really up to yourself what you do with it to achieve the things you need in life. It’s up to you to get up & push yourself to achieve the greatness that’s within you.
3. Opinions of others
Most of the time I really do try to live my life unaffected by the thoughts & opinions of others but on days when I’m caught off guard, it does wreak havoc on my anxiety. I become wary & distrusting of everyone based on one individuals actions.
Actor Anthony Hopkins stated such an important FACT that I’ve now decided to abide by. He said & I quote “My philosophy is: It’s none of my business what people say of me & think of me. I am what I am and I do what I do. I expect nothing & accept everything. And it makes life so much easier.” Try living by that philosophy for a week or two, see how it makes you feel.
The funny thing is I’m not fearful of death, it’s the aftermath of death, the effect death has on people left to handle it. The fear affects me to the point I don’t like leaving my house sometimes, if I do I’m particular about certain routes I drive, the time of day as well as distance. I imagine the worse scenarios in my head & consistently play them on repeat which usually urges me to get home faster to safety. I pray my fears away but at times they can be very overwhelming. At the end of the day, death is inevitable I guess when it’s your time it is what it is but for me being unprepared gives me anxiety. The thought of leaving my son ugh gives me the shivers
5. Being lonely
The singular word ‘lonely’ gives me severe anxiety, despite having a child & wanting to get married & grow with my Husband, for some reason i’ve just always envisioned myself being lonely forever. Especially with my background, I never believed I would find someone who would be willing to take on my faults as well as my families. Someone who would stand by my side & support me through thick & thin. No I have still not found that person but i’m more open minded to the fact that I don’t have to be lonely forever & maybe just maybe all these years of talking about being lonely has actually manifested the trait within me. I try not to stay within my bubble too often these days even though it is extremely hard to not revert back to my introvert ways but it is possible & I will continuously push myself to do so.
Peace + Love Guys
Hope you can read & relate please feel free to let me know your thoughts.
Disclaimer: Image taken from instagram page: SavingDaughters